如何成熟地與具挑戰性的孩子相處？

Being a Mature Self with Challenging Children

25/4/2020 (Sat) 3:00 pm – 5:30 pm

Online Attendance Available

「點解口罩一定要遮住個口呢？」、「點解一定要食完飯才可以食甜品？」、「點解我唔可以咁樣做？」、「我唔鍾意你啊！」以上一連串具挑戰性的問題，可能大家平日與小孩相處亦會遇過的。

具挑戰性的小孩可謂林林種種，除了以上例子或一些有攻擊性行為的小孩較為「顯眼」，一些如天使般的小孩，處處善解人意、但卻毫無保留地放棄自我、跟隨父母及權威的意旨，以搏取他人的認同和讚賞；或是一些隱者小孩；或常作小丑的小孩，他們避免與人有真摯的接觸，內心早已實行了社交距離措施 – 以上有這行為動態的小朋友可能更富挑戰性!

我們如何培育這些各有千秋的孩子，及明瞭這些孩子的行為動態是如何煉出來的？博域理論 (Bowen theory) 強調若成人能自處適宜、理性處事，以致能提供一個平靜安穩的情緒環境給孩子，對孩子的成長至為重要。

孩子身邊的重要成年人，如家長、社工、老師，與孩子一起時，我們應如何自處，尤其是身陷繁重的工作和焦慮時？作為助人自助的社會工作者，一方面要支援家長去面對小孩的挑戰，一方面亦希望可協助小孩子獨立成長，如何自處得宜，避免不自覺地偏幫某一方面，陷入情緒三角，使問題更覆雜？

講者郭詠雯女士會與我們作個案分享，討論箇中的體驗和要素。

誠邀大家一同以＜博域視野＞一同探討以上課題。

“Why must the mask cover the mouth?” “Why must I finish dinner before I can have dessert?”, “Why can’t I do this?” “I don’t like you!” These are all familiar and challenging comments from children that you may encounter each day.

Challenging kids come in all sorts of forms, they may be obviously defiant, but others can appear to be angelic and emphatic, or come across as bashful or acting as jokers. But inwardly, they may be putting out a front to disengage from really connecting with people. These are the really challenging ones.

So how did they come about in forming these facades and how should we nurture them?

Bowen theory stipulates that having a neutral, rational, calm and stable environment provided by adults are the most important factors facilitating a child’s growth.  How then can we, as their parents, social workers or teachers, be the best of ourselves for them, especially under anxious and stressful times?

One of the challenges of being a social worker is the need to support parents in disciplining their challenging children as well as helping the kids to develop their independence. How does one balance these dilemmas yet avoiding oneself to be drawn into a triangle to complicate matters?

Come and hear our presenter Ms. Oliver Kwok as she shares her experience and insights and lead us into more discussions at the coming Bowen Vision Activity.

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